tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4980720454317909022.post1652303310035539341..comments2017-06-02T01:06:43.537-07:00Comments on The Strident Geek: ChoosingAbi Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14513895101815281106noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4980720454317909022.post-81778033438009311722012-10-09T16:34:43.678-07:002012-10-09T16:34:43.678-07:00Thanks Rebecca. I agree, and women get accused of...Thanks Rebecca. I agree, and women get accused of inventing problems a lot more often than we actually do so. <br /><br />A common argument against believing people of any gender who talk about being abused is "well what if they made it up". Women bear the brunt of it because society still fundamentally believes women are "hysterical" and prone to overreaction. Given the enormous amount of pressure put on women *not* to talk about abuse when it occurs, the idea that any significant number of them would make it up is ludicrous. <br /><br />Proof is important in a court case; in a social situation you need to decide who you trust. In general, I trust the person saying "I was abused" more than I trust the person saying "she's making it up" or "she's hysterical" or "he just wants attention". That's because I know what it's like to stay up nights worrying about whether anyone will believe me. It's also because false reports of domestic violence are quite rare, while violence itself is reasonably common. 1 in 4 women report being abused, and that number is likely low give the pressure not to report it. <br /><br />http://www.xyonline.net/content/fact-sheet-2-myth-women%E2%80%99s-false-accusations-domestic-violence-and-misuse-protection-orders <br /><br />http://www.dvrc-or.org/domestic/violence/resources/C61/Abi Hhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14513895101815281106noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4980720454317909022.post-35450660551004078582012-10-09T15:05:23.838-07:002012-10-09T15:05:23.838-07:00Well said. I'm so tired of the notion that pr...Well said. I'm so tired of the notion that problems and socially imperfect situations are OMG THE END OF THE WORLD, and that not-being-given-awareness-of-a-problem is the same thing as there-is-no-problem. <br /><br />There are people in the world who invent problems. That is a very different thing from talking about problems that already concretely exist whether anyone can countenance the cognitive dissonance it takes to talk about them or not.<br /><br />Great post, Abby. You're a marvel.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02357238414225774123noreply@blogger.com